


Frayed Ends

by 88exile



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Childhood Friends, Daddy Issues, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route Spoilers, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Injury Recovery, M/M, Post-Timeskip | War Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Slow Burn, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-27
Updated: 2020-03-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:54:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22428925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/88exile/pseuds/88exile
Summary: After the only woman he ever had romantic feelings for goes missing, Felix convinces himself that he's better off spending the rest of his life alone. That is, until his childhood friend confesses feelings for him and makes him rethink his life plans.Meanwhile, Byleth wakes up and finds the former prince of Faerghus in a disturbed state of mind and in an attempt to rehabilitate him, ends up sinking to his level.After their reunion, Byleth and Felix must reconnect the frayed ends that were severed during their time apart and learn how to love once again.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/My Unit | Byleth, Felix Hugo Fraldarius/My Unit | Byleth, Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Comments: 9
Kudos: 70





	1. "I already said I wasn't going to die for anyone, you don't need to worry"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to my beta reader [ @saviana572](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sav572) please check out their [latest fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20941196/chapters/49786922) if you like the Felileth pairing. Seriously, go do it. You won't regret it!

It wasn't until the sun left the sky that things finally started to quiet down around the monastery. Her father's funeral had been held earlier that morning, but Byleth could hardly even remember anything that was said during the sermon. The entire time, she had felt like an empty shell of a person, completely detached from the world around her. She had only come back to her senses when she heard the thud of dirt piling against the wooden coffin. Hours later, that sound still echoed in her ears. It hadn’t yet sunk in that her father was gone. Gone with all of his secrets buried with him.  
  
The rest of the day Byleth was forced to listen to every person she encountered give their condolences and offer to assist her. She really did appreciate that so many people were looking out for her, but hated being pitied. What she wanted more than anything right now was to be alone.  
  
Earlier in the day, she had searched Jeralt's room, for clues regarding the church's involvement with her birth. That left her with more questions than answers. Feeling defeated, Byleth found herself standing in front of the gravestone now belonging to both of her parents. She thought maybe if she stared at the gravestone long enough, it would give her some answers. And when that plan obviously failed, at least she could take solace in being alone. At least Byleth thought she was alone.  
  
"I didn't think anyone would be here this late." Felix’s voice came from behind, startling Byleth. She glanced over her shoulder and gave her young student a slight nod. Looking over him, she noticed he held a bouquet of flowers. At least from this distance, they appeared to be white lilies.  
  
Felix’s voice was quiet. "Sorry I missed out on the funeral earlier, they aren't really my thing.” I prefer to pay my respects in private." Carefully he plucked one of the lilies from the bouquet before placing the rest of the flowers next to the gravestone. He offered her the flower but didn't give her a chance to thank him before he spoke again. 

"Don't stay out here too long, you'll catch a cold." Felix started his way back up the stairs. "Wouldn't want such a good sparring partner to be out of commission."  
  
She looked down at the flower in her hand. Even in the dark, the velvety white petals were visible, brightening up the dreary night.  
  
"Felix?" She called out weakly, now realizing how hoarse her voice was. Felix was halfway up the steps leading away from the graveyard when he turned around, waiting for her to continue speaking.  
  
The words seemed to slip out. "Will you stay for a bit?" If Byleth was honest with herself, she wasn’t sure where the words had even come from.  
  
She had spent all day wishing to be alone and now with that very opportunity, she wanted nothing more than Felix’s company. But Felix was different. She knew he wouldn't offer her empty words of comfort or meaningless apologies. He might not even say anything to her at all. Either way, she had already put the question out there, so all that was left to do was brace herself for his rejection.  
  


* * *

  
Felix couldn't see the professor’s face easily in the dark, but he could see her eyes. They were pleading, like one of the pathetic-looking mutts that always hung around the outside of the dining hall, begging for scraps. Immediately he felt guilty for making that comparison in his head. The professor was a person, one he admired deeply, not some stray dog. 

Perhaps that was why he so badly wanted to run away from the current situation. He wasn't used to seeing this side of his professor. She had earned the nickname “Ashen Demon” on the battlefield for her quick decision-making and ability to not let emotions cloud her judgment. Now, as she stood in front of her father’s grave, she looked anything but demon-like. For once, she showed her emotions and Felix realized she wasn’t so different from himself. As much as he didn't want to stand next to a grave all night, Felix couldn't bring himself to say no to the professor’s request.  
  
He didn't give voice to his answer, but instead walked back over to the grave plot and stood next to her, almost shoulder-to-shoulder. Neither of them spoke right away, but the silence was surprisingly comfortable between them. The Professor wasn't one for words normally, often expressing herself through her actions instead. The only time she really carried on a conversation was during strategy meetings or combat training. Felix supposed he was the same way, always fixated on training and surpassing his peers. He finally decided to break the silence.  
  
"Your mother is buried here too?" He took notice of the other name carved into the gravestone, worn away with time to the point it could no longer be read. The only legible part was the year of death: 1159.  
  
"Yes, I only just found that out recently. I never knew her. She died shortly after I was born."  
  
"So that means you're twenty-one? Old enough to be a student here." Felix had always wondered how old the professor was, but when asked before, she claimed to not remember. It seemed like a joke at first, but the expression on her face had no hint of jest.  
  
"I guess so..." She spoke in almost a whisper. "There's so much of my life I have no memory of. I always wanted to ask my father for answers but now..." The professor’s voice trailed off. Felix didn't push her to continue. 

Instead, she leaned her head against his shoulder and sighed. He was only about ten centimeters taller than her, so she could reach comfortably. Felix froze, not knowing how to react to the sudden closeness. He settled for just standing still to let her rest. She didn't seem to mind, considering they stayed in that position for a few minutes before she finally spoke again.  
  
"We should probably head inside." She lifted her head off his shoulder and stood upright. He was suddenly aware of how cold it was without her warmth against him.  
  
"Sure. I'll walk you back to your room?" It wasn't intended to be a question, but his hesitation made it come out like one. He cringed at how Sylvain-like he sounded, chivalrously offering to walk a girl back to her room, usually with the intention of bedding them.  
Felix pushed away that thought. Unlike Sylvain, he had no interest in courting women. Especially not his grieving professor.  
  
By leth nodded in response and gave one last parting glance to the gravestone before heading back towards the monastery. The pair walked side-by-side, close enough that their shoulders occasionally brushed. His instinct made him flinch away from the touch, but if the professor noticed, it didn't stop her from maintaining the closeness between them. He felt her pinky finger momentarily graze his own . An action he was certain was accidental. But when it happened again, he started to question the touch. Before he could figure out if there was any meaning behind her action, they were outside of her dormitory. Eventually, Felix came to the conclusion that all of her accidental touches were meaningless. If the professor really wanted his company, she would invite him inside or something.  
  
"Would you...want to come in? I could make us a pot of tea."  
  
Felix was so lost in his own thoughts that he almost didn't hear her say it. But when his brain finally processed her words...  
  
_Shit._  
  
Byleth continued speaking when he didn't respond right away. "Sorry, I know it's late. I shouldn't keep you up longer than I already have. It was foolish of me to-"   
  
"Yes, that sounds ok." He interrupted before she could keep unnecessarily apologizing. Suddenly, he was aware of how nervous he was and swallowed hard. There was no going back now. Well, there was. He could always just turn the other direction and bolt off towards his dorm without saying another word. Sylvain would have a field day if he ever found out his best friend did something that embarrassing. Instead, he crossed the threshold into his professor's room.  
  
Felix wasn't sure what he expected. The professor’s dorm looked the same as the rest. The only difference was all of the papers strewn about, likely exams waiting to be graded. That and the Sword of the Creator propped up against the desk in the corner of the room. It was Felix’s first time seeing the relic up close. Yes, his family was in possession of a hero's relic, and Felix had seen the Lance of Ruin plenty of times, but something about her relic was more...unsettling. Unlike Sylvain’s lance, her sword pulsated, as if it was a beating heart. An eerie orange glow began to radiate which he realized was caused by the professor walking closer to it like the sword sensed her presence.  
  
"Do you want to hold it?" The professor had obviously noticed him staring. Felix always had an interest in weapons, especially swords. However, it felt wrong to ask to touch something so sacred. She didn't wait for an answer to pick up the sword and offer it to him.  
  
"You trust me with something like this?" His voice was skeptical.  
  
"If there's anyone I trust with a sword, it's definitely you." She lifted the corner of her mouth in a small offering of a smile. Felix beamed with pride at her words. With a small amount of hesitation, he gripped the sword.  
  
"It's so heavy. You actually swing this around?" He brandished the sword a moment before handing it back to her. He would have liked to inspect it longer, but the sheer weight of the armament combined with the strange way it squirmed in his hand made him want to rid himself of the thing right away.  
  
"It's only heavy if you don't have the crest to wield it."  
  
"I see." He nodded. "Have you ever let anyone else hold your sword?"  
  
"Only you." She looked up at him for a moment before going back to her tea-making. For some reason, he liked that thought of being the only other person to touch the sword. "So you'll have to let me hold that shield of yours sometime."  
  
"Sure. It's mostly gathering dust anyways. I don't know why the old man gave it to me. It should have been Glenn's."  
  
"Is that why you haven’t used it?" She sat a teacup in front of him and started pouring. The aroma was bitter and earthy, just how he liked it.  
  
"Because it reminds me of Glenn? No, I don't let the dead haunt me, unlike the boar. The reason I don't use it is because I refuse to walk the same path as my brother. I will never be the ’Shield of Faerghus’ or a chivalrous hero who throws their life away for honor." He scoffed. "I don't need a shield to protect those I care about. I can cut down anyone who gets in my way and stay alive doing it."  
  
Considering how late at night it was, his voice was probably louder than it should have been. Internally, Felix cursed himself for ruining a relaxing evening with more of his self-righteous ramblings about his family problems. Maybe he should have apologized, but the stubborn part of himself refused. Instead, he chose to avoid eye contact with the professor and gaze into the brown liquid in his cup.  
  
"That's comforting." She said, her voice quiet and calm as ever. His eyebrow raised as he looked up at her. He was expecting a lecture, such as one he would receive from Ingrid whenever she was upset with him. Instead, the woman in front of him was giving him an almost endearing look.  
  
"What?" The bite in his voice was unintentional. Felix tried his best to tone it down. "What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
"I don't want you to throw away your life for anyone, honorably or not. It's comforting to know that you don't want that for yourself either."  
  
"Want to keep me around that badly? Hah, guess all the training has paid off."  
  
"Yes, you are a skilled swordsman, but you have much more to offer than just your blade. Your actions haven’t gone unnoticed."  
  
"I spend most of my time in the training grounds. What else could I possibly be good for outside of the battlefield?" He didn't expect an answer, but she surprised him yet again.  
  
"You're very honest, even if it hurts. At times, it can be overbearing, but often that's necessary. You’ve kept everyone grounded. And I can see just how much you care for your childhood friends, even Dimitri, as much as you won't admit it. No matter how annoyed you act in their presence, you're always the first to lend them a hand when they need it."  
  
He thought t hat was the last of the praise , but she continued. "Annette sings more after speaking with you, Ashe trains harder in your presence. Mercedes never stops smiling when you're around and Dedue trusts you almost as much as himself to protect Dimitri."  
  
"Okay. Stop. I get it. I already said I wasn't going to die for anyone, you don't need to worry." Felix already had enough trouble making eye contact while talking without being showered with so many compliments. To top it all off, he could feel a familiar heat rush to his face and ears. For once, he actually wished his hair was down to hide some of the embarrassment.  
  
"Thank you for spending time with me tonight, Felix. Honestly, I spent most of my day avoiding people. If I had to hear 'I'm sorry for your loss' one more time..." She didn't finish that thought. "Anyway, I wouldn't mind spending time like this again. Under different circumstances, of course."  
  
"Spending time with you is...not bad." He admitted. 

It might have been the lighting, but he could have sworn her face grew redder. Something about seeing her flustered by his words made his heart flutter in his chest. Her face appeared to glow under the warm candlelight and he caught her trying to hide a smile as she sipped her tea. Was his professor always this beautiful? He needed to escape quickly before his thoughts wandered any further.  
  
"Anyways, I need to leave. Just try to get some sleep. You'll be sluggish during training tomorrow if you don't." He stood up, stretched out a little, and put on his usual uncaring facade. Her eyes seemed sad to see him go, nevertheless, he stood his ground and made his way over to the exit. She followed him to the door, closing it behind him as he left.  
  
Once outside, he let out a long exhale. as if he was holding his breath the whole time he was with the professor. It crossed his mind that if anyone were to walk by and see him outside the professor's room at night, there would definitely be gossip. He needed to get back to his room before anyone spotted him.  
  
"Felix?"  
  
A number of profanities came to mind as he heard the voice he recognized so well.  
  
"Sylvain." Felix kept his voice as aloof as possible. Maybe if he acted like everything was normal, Sylvain wouldn't hound him for details. After acknowledging his friend, Felix continued towards his dormitory.  
  
"Hey, wait up!"  
  
No matter how Felix tried to outpace his friend, he was unable. Sylvain had longer legs  
  
"C'mon, you can't just leave me hanging like that. Why are you out so late? And outside of our professor's room?" Sylvain wiggled his eyebrows at the last part of his sentence. Felix almost wanted to punch him ...almost.  
  
"It doesn't concern you. I could ask you the same thing."  
  
"Now, don't make this about me. You know I'm always out late. I was taking a girl back to her room and I did a double-take when I saw you standing there. C'mon, tell me everything!"  
  
"There's nothing to tell, you insatiable idiot. Did you forget that our professor is grieving?"  
  
"I see! So you were just 'comforting' her." Sylvain gave one of his usual winking smirks. "Aw, Felix how come you’ve never come 'comfort' me when I'm sad?"  
  
"Do you have a death wish?" He hissed. As much as he wanted to scream, it wouldn't do him any good to attract more unwanted attention. "We’re done."  
  
"Sorry, I'll stop." Sylvain was still smiling, but his voice was more serious now. "Is the professor okay?"  
  
"She seemed sad when I left, but no worse than before."  
  
"She was sad about you leaving and you actually left her? Oh, Felix...you're cute when you're oblivious." He crossed his hands behind his head, still grinning.  
  
"I'm not going to spend the night with the professor, you half-wit. It's called having dignity, not obliviousness."  
  
"So you won't be mad if I take your place then? I'm sure I could 'comfort' her better than you can." He quickly winked before turning in the opposite direction towards the dorms. Felix yanked the redhead’s wrist, stopping him. "Sylvain, don't you dare!” He warned.  
  
"Aha! So you do like her." Sylvain beamed with pride as if he’s figured out the answer to a complicated math equation.  
  
"I- what? You can't be serious. You _are_ actually the most insufferable person I've ever met."  
  
"Aw, love you too, Felix. I'm sorry, I'll really stop now. It's just...I've never seen you show interest in a female before. It's honestly kind of adorable."  
  
"I have no interest in women or romance." He grumbled.  
  
"No interest in women, huh? So you're saying I have a chance?" Sylvain bumped him teasingly with his shoulder.  
  
“Not what I meant. Even if I wasn’t interested in females you would still have no chance.”  
  
Overdramacially, Sylvain pressed his palm against his chest. "Ouch. I'm going to go sulk in my room for the rest of the night."  
  
They were finally approaching their dorms on the second floor now and Felix wasn't sure how much more of Sylvain's theatrics he could tolerate. A thought crossed his mind right before they were about to go their separate ways.  
  
"Hey, Sylvain?" His voice was soft this time, without a hint of annoyance.  
  
"Yes, Fee?"  
  
"Please don’t mention anything about me with the professor. There isn’t anything worth mentioning, but I wouldn’t want rumors to spread."  
  
"You know I wouldn't do that." He pressed his lips together in a slight frown. Felix nodded in acknowledgment and said goodnight to his friend before he closed the door. There was no doubt that Sylvain could be trusted and he was thankful to have such a loyal friend, even with all the teasing that came along with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on [ Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/RatKingDimitri) for updates or if you want to discuss all things FE!
> 
> Some quick notes about the direction of this fic:
> 
> -Byleth x Felix is the main pairing. All other tagged relationships will come into play later, but hopefully that won't deter you if you're only here for Felileth
> 
> -There will be a lot of skipping around, so if you haven't finished the Azure Moon route it might get confusing
> 
> -Weekly updates until further notice
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	2. "And bring a bow"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth takes out her anger on a training dummy. Felix has a better plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta reader: [ Sav572](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sav572) please check out their [latest fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20941196/chapters/49786922) if you haven't already!

At sunrise, Felix made his way to the training grounds as. Usually, he arrived early enough to have the space to himself but today the professor had beaten him. He watched as she relentlessly hacked away at the training dummy with the Sword of the Creator, sending bits of straw into the air.  
  
Her hair looked like a disheveled mess while her eyes had unusually dark circles underneath them. The amount of sweat that dripped down her forehead led Felix to believe she'd been there for hours. As the heavy wooden doors slammed shut behind him, the professor was alerted to his presence. Looking up from the training dummy, she called out to him. "Spar with me."  
  
"I never get tired of fighting you but are you sure this is a good idea?” He asked. Before she answered, he grabbed a training sword off the rack in anticipation. Something was off about her. Still, he wasn't one to refuse a duel.  
  
"I'm sure.”  
  
"How long have you been here? You look terrible.” He said bluntly.  
  
"Awhile." She continued to take her frustration out on the dummy, not bothering to face him. Felix worried that he would suffer the same fate as the dummy if he fought her; slashed up into tiny pieces with his insides spilled like the straw. Normally, her combat style was clean and precise, but today it was uncontrolled.. It reminded him of the way the boar prince fought when his bloodlust was unleashed.  
  
Placing the wooden blade back on its rack, Felix walked over to the professor, determined to put a stop to her madness. Grabbing the wrist of her sword-hand, Felix stopped her mid-swing. She attempted to break his hold to keep swinging, but his grip didn't falter.  
  
"What are you trying to accomplish by carelessly swinging that thing around? You're going to blunt your blade for nothing."  
  
"Let. Go." The professor hissed through her teeth.  
  
Her response only made Felix tighten his grip. "No."  
  
"I'm your professor. Let go." This time, her voice was demanding. He wasn't afraid to disobey his professor’s orders.  
  
"If you're going to pull the professor card on me, at least act like one." He scoffed."You're acting like a child who's toy is being taken away."  
  
"I just want to be left alone." She stopped resisting, but he kept his tight hold on her wrist.  
  
"Well, you picked the wrong place for that. You know I come here at this time every morning."  
  
"I know." She looked towards the ground.  
  
"If you knew, then-" he paused as he made the connection. "Were you waiting for me?"  
  
The professor’s eyes remained glued to the ground, refusing to meet his gaze. When Felix finally let go of her wrist, it fell down to her side in defeat.  
  
"Have you eaten yet?" He asked. She shook her head in response. "C'mon, I'm getting you something to eat.”  
  
"I'm fine." She stubbornly insisted.  
  
"You’re not. If you don't eat anything, you'll pass out. I'm not carrying you to the infirmary." She gave him another defeated look. "If we go now, we can beat the crowd."  
  
Finally, his words seemed to break her stubbornness, and together they made their way to the dining hall. He commanded her to take a seat at one of the tables in the back while he went and picked up food, deciding on a simple porridge that wouldn't require much effort to eat.  
  
"Here. Eat." He sat the bowl down in front of her and took a seat across the table. She fiddled with the spoon instead of taking a bite.  
  
"What about you? Aren't you going to eat?" She looked at him questioningly.  
  
"You eat first."  
  
Sighing, the professor took a bite and then another until the bowl was finished. Felix took up the empty and came back with food of his own, and an apple for her.  
  
"I already ate." She looked at the piece of fruit questioningly.  
  
"If you plan on training today, you'll need the extra energy. No training if you don't eat it." Her bottom lip stuck out in protest and Felix was amused to see the person in charge of teaching his class pout over something as trivial as eating an apple. It was almost endearing, but he would never admit that. Without falter, he kept his eyes fixed on her until she reluctantly took a bite. Neither of them said anything until their food was finished.  
  
Felix was first to speak. “Do you still want to train?" She nodded. "The training grounds will fill up soon. I'd suggest going somewhere more private if you don't want to be bothered." 

She looked deep in thought for a moment before sighing. "I'm not sure where to go. Even outside, there's always knights patrolling the area." The corner of her mouth turned downward.  
  
"Meet me at the stables half past the hour. I can show you a place." Not bothering to wait for a response, Felix stood up from the table. "And bring a bow."

* * *

When Byleth arrived at the stables, Felix was already there, saddling up a horse with a distinct midnight-black coat.  
  
"Isn’t that Sylvain's horse?" She raised an eyebrow at him.  
  
"He won't mind if I borrow it." Felix climbed up on top of the horse in one sweeping motion Byleth mused he had been surprisingly graceful. He'd always fought battles on foot, so she didn't expect him to have riding experience.  
  
_Where do you think he's taking you?_ Sothis mused inside her head. _Is this a date?! If so, you should ask if you can ride on his horse with him. It'll be so romantic!_ Mentally, Byleth rolled her eyes at the goddess.

"Are you coming with me or not?" The bite in Felix’s voice snapped Byleth back to reality.  
  
"Yes. Should I grab my horse or do you want me to ride with you?" The words left her lips faster than her brain could process them. She cursed Sothis for putting the idea of sharing a horse in her mind.  
  
"Like I care. Just decide quickly unless you want someone to see us leaving."  
  
Before she could overthink, Byleth grabbed ahold of the saddle and hoisted herself up onto Sylvain’s horse with ease. Once seated securely behind Felix, she placed both hands onto his waist, letting him know she was ready. With a careful flick of the reins, they were on their way.  
  
Once they were far enough away from the monastery, Felix gave the horse a kick and brought their speed up to a canter. Byleth had to tighten her grip on him to avoid falling off. He didn't seem to mind or notice, but she was acutely aware of how close they were. Anytime there was uneven ground, she would be jostled into his backside, close enough that she could smell his hair. It smelled earthy, like sandalwood or maybe pine.  
  
They rode through the countryside for a while, following no clear path. She questioned whether he had a destination in mind or not. Eventually, they slowed to a stop in front of a small forest opening. It wasn't a very dense forest, but the trees in it were tall enough to block a portion of sunlight from coming through. Felix hopped off the horse first and offered her a hand. She was perfectly capable of getting herself down, but she took his hand anyway. They felt just like her own; calloused from years of wielding a sword.

"We're going hunting." He explained as he led her through the forest opening into a small clearing. "If you want to get in a few practice shots, there are some targets over there." He pointed to a few distant trees that had makeshift targets carved into them.  
  
"Do you come here often?" She asked.  
  
"Not so much anymore, but I used to come out here whenever I wanted to avoid interacting with people. No one knows about this place."  
  
"Until now." She pointed out.  
  
"True. I guess I'll have to find a new hunting spot." He sounded serious, but the smirk on his face said otherwise.  
  
Taking the bow out, Byleth adjusted the string before taking aim. It wasn't a perfect shot, but she hit the target easily on her first try.  
  
"I should have known you'd be good with a bow, with your mercenary background and all."  
  
"My father and I used to hunt a lot, actually. There wasn't always time to stay at an inn between jobs, so we'd camp and hunt on our way to the next town.” As she explained, Felix took a shot of his own. The arrow landed slightly off-centered, close to where her own hit.  
  
"Have you considered taking the bow knight certification? We could use some extra strength on the backline.” She expected refusal from the swordsman since he usually preferred to be closer to the action, but she asked anyway. 

"As long as you're not going to make me command a battalion, I don't care where you put me.” Surprised by his indifference, she made a mental note to ask him about it again next exam day.  
  
After they sufficiently warmed up, they set out on their individual hunts. Both were experienced hunters, so they settled on going separate ways and meeting back up after they got their first kill. Byleth chose a tree with low-hanging branches for her hunting spot, preferring to have an aerial view when using a bow.  
  
There were no animals for a while, at least none she could get a good shot at, but the quietness of the forest was relaxing. Keeping her ears focused on the forest sounds was a decent distraction from her gloomy thoughts. For the first time since her father's death, her head felt clear. It was difficult to admit, but the thought of getting revenge on her father’s killer preoccupied her mind more than it should have. So much that she found herself unable to sleep at night.  
  
With a little patience, Byleth was finally able to shoot a pheasant. She hopped down from the tree she was perched in and made her way back to the clearing with the fresh kill in hand. When she got back, Felix was already there, cleaning a wild rabbit with his hunting knife. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows and sweat dripped from his brow. A few loose strands of hair had fallen out of his bun, sticking themselves to the sides of his face like a perfect frame.  
  
"Nice catch." He looked up from his rabbit and eyed the plump pheasant in her hand. "Do you mind getting a fire going? It'll be easier with fire magic."  
  
She nodded. Although she wasn’t proficient with magic, she managed to pick up on a few basic spells while instructing her students. There were some dry branches nearby, so she gathered them up into a pile and ignited them with a fire spell. It was still daytime, but since the tree canopy blocked out most of the sunlight, the fire lit up their area of the forest with a warm glow. Felix skewered a few chunks of rabbit meat on a pointed stick he carved and started roasting them over the fire.  
  
"Worked up an appetite yet?" He asked once the meat was sufficiently cooked. She nodded. He bit off one of the pieces of meat from the stick and handed it over to her. She did the same. Passing the stick back and forth, they devoured the tender meat until they both had their fill. As the crackling fire died into embers, they remained seated, enjoying each other’s company. 

The rest of the afternoon was spent training archery, only taking breaks to cook up more meat when they got hungry. During Guardian Moon, the sun sank much earlier, so it wasn’t long before they climbed atop Sylvain’s horse and began their journey back to the monastery before darkness caught up with them.

* * *

Trotting through the forest, Felix reflected on his day. Even though he preferred to hunt in solitude, he decided company wasn't so bad with the right person. And that person happened to be his professor, now asleep behind him with her arms wrapped tightly around his waist and her head on his shoulder. She was close enough that he could feel her soft breaths against his neck with every quiet snore. If this was how every hunting trip ended, he could definitely get used to having company.  
  
It was not a smooth ride, so she must have been exhausted if she was able to sleep through it. And judging by the heavy bags under her eyes earlier, she must have gotten little sleep the night before. So he kept the pace slow, trying his best not to disturb her slumber. He also didn't mind that their trip lasted a little longer. When he finally arrived back at the stables, his charmingly annoying friend greeted him.  
  
"You know, if you needed to borrow my horse for a date, all you had to do was ask." Sylvain winked at him. He was leaned up against the stable wall with his arms crossed.  
  
"Keep your voice down." Felix whispered, ignoring the previous comment.  
  
"Sorry!" He said in an exaggerated whisper. "I saw my horse was missing, and I knew nobody would take him but you. And when I didn't see the professor all day either...well, I just had to see it for myself." He grinned, crossing his arms behind his head like he usually does when he's feeling smug.  
  
"At least make yourself useful and help me get her down."  
  
Sylvain complied and quickly walked over to the horse so he could hold the professor in place while Felix climbed down. From there, he scooped her off the top of the horse and handed her over to Felix.  
  
"I'll take care of the horse, you go ahead and get her to bed." Sylvain smiled sweetly and grabbed the reins." But you better tell me everything this time. I expect a full report once you get back to your room."  
  
"Yeah, yeah." Felix huffed. He held the professor bridal-style in his arms.  
  
"That is if you do plan on coming back to your room tonight." Sylvain winked.  
  
"I'm leaving you now." He decided the best way to handle Sylvain’s teasing was to just walk away. The professor wasn't overly heavy, but carrying a full-sized adult was no easy task. And the dorms were relatively far from the stables.  
  
After only a mild struggle, he arrived at her dorm and managed to get the door open. No candles were lit but enough light came in through the window that he could find his way to the bed. As gently as possible, he lowered her down onto it and draped the covers over her. On his way out, he noticed the flower he gave her the night before was now in a vase on the bedside table. The vase was too large for one single flower, so the stem flopped pathetically over the edge. He considered bringing more flowers to fill it with, but he worried about the kind of message that would send. The last thing he wanted was for his professor to think he was trying to court her. He wouldn't put it past some of his classmates to try such a thing, but his current focus was on his combat training and nothing more.

Closing the door quietly behind him, Felix headed back to his dorm and braced himself for Sylvain's incoming interrogation. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on [ Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/RatKingDimitri) for updates. 
> 
> Side note: Sylvain has a black horse because he is a dark knight class in this story. Mage Sylvain is best Sylvain change my mind.


	3. "I am not in love with her"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sylvain changes his behavior, Felix and Ingrid go shopping, and Byleth gives a thoughtful gift.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I formatted this chapter into what I am calling "support scenes" that focus on character interactions. They still advance the plot, but I just wanted to try something different with the formatting. Let me know if it works! 
> 
> Beta read by [ Sav572](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sav572) please check out the latest chapter in their [Felileth fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20941196/chapters/49786922)!

i.

"Felix, can I talk to you for a minute?" The professor came up to Felix while he was training. There was an unusual urgency in her voice that made him nervous. She pulled him to the side of the training grounds to speak privately.

Raising his eyebrow Felix asked. "What's wrong?” 

The professor sounded genuinely concerned. "It's about Sylvain. He's been acting strange lately. He’s not his usual self." Felix found it hard to believe something was wrong with Sylvain. He seemed perfectly normal when they spoke last but he trusted the professor’s judgment. 

Without bothering to ask for more details Felix blurted out. "I'll go find him." After the professor thanked him, Felix put away the wooden sword and went off in search of the redhead.

When he finally found Sylvain, he was in his room polishing the Lance of Ruin. He looked surprised to see Felix barge in.

"Hey, Felix, is everything okay?" 

"I’m the one who should be asking you that. 

"Huh?" His mouth was agape. "What are you talking about?" 

Felix explained. "The professor said you've been acting strange lately. I came to check on you." He watched as his childhood friend pondered something for a moment before Sylvain’s face transformed into a cheery grin.

"Oh, I know what this is about." His expression was smug. "She probably thinks I'm acting different lately because I stopped flirting with her." 

"You...what?" Felix was in complete shock. "You really aren't okay, are you?" 

Sylvain just laughed."I just don't want to flirt with the woman my best friend is in love with."

Crossing his arms, Felix protested. "I am not in love with her." 

"Who said I was talking about you? I have other best friends, you know. Maybe his Highness is in love with the professor."

"Like the boar is capable of emotions other than bloodlust." Felix scoffed at the thought.

"Whoa, easy on the insults. I was only teasing." Sylvain put his hands up defensively. "Yes, I was referring to you. And I mean it, Fee. I'm not going to flirt with her anymore. I can tell you have feelings for her and-“

Felix interrupted Sylvain’s foolish train of thought."Don't pretend to know how I feel." Internally Felix cursed his emotions for betraying him as he felt heat flood his face

"OK, sorry! Either way, I'm still going to stop. Flirting with her is a lost cause anyway." 

"You finally realized you don't have a chance?” He quipped. 

"Something like that. It’s hard to flirt with a girl who has eyes on someone else." 

"Who?" He realized it wasn’t any of his business who his professor was interested in, but he still wanted to know. 

"Goddess, Felix. You really are thick." Sylvain leaned back against his chair and rested his hands behind his head, smirking to himself. “It’s obviously you.” 

Felix didn’t have time to listen to Sylvain’s teasing today. There was no possible way his friend was being serious. "If nothing is wrong with you, then I’m leaving.” He said as he turned towards the door to leave. 

"Tell the professor thanks for her concern." Sylvain winked. Felix just rolled his eyes. 

As he began his treck back to the training grounds, Felix couldn't help but wonder if there was any truth in Sylvain's words. The skirt-chaser was more perceptive than others gave him credit for. And even though he would never say it out loud, Felix appreciated Sylvain's decision to stop flirting with the professor. 

* * *

ii.

"Care to join me for tea after this?" 

Their swords clashed again. Felix and the professor sparred in the training grounds after a long day of lessons. 

"I'd rather keep sparring. I'll never surpass you if we keep having tea time every day." He tried to throw her off guard by sweeping his sword at her leg, but she was quick to block it. 

"I'm sure one tea break won't set you back too much." Another _chunk_ of their wooden swords crossing. Sure, a single tea break wouldn’t hurt, but she started asking him daily to join her. It wasn’t that he didn’t enjoy their time together, but he could feel the eyes of curious students gawking at them as they sat at their usual courtyard table. 

"Fine." He reluctantly agreed. "But only if you stop holding back. I can tell that you are." 

"If you're sure." There was a glimmer of challenge in her eyes that made him eager to swing his sword at her. He loved seeing the competitive side of the professor, something she rarely showed to other students. 

The sparring session didn't last long once she stopped restraining herself. Felix was strong, but her speed was unmatched. She was untouchable as she swiftly dodged every swing, somehow managing to get in two hits on him before he could think about hitting her once. It was a total stomp, but he enjoyed losing to her. It was a rare feeling brought on only by a worthy opponent. 

As promised, he joined her for tea at the small table in the courtyard. Judging by the aroma, she brewed one of his favorite teas again. 

"Why don't you ever brew your favorite tea?" He asked. He could put up with something sweet once in a while if that was her preference. 

"I don't really have a favorite. I drink this kind often enough that it'll probably become my favorite too." She tilted her head slightly and smiled. He noticed she was smiling more often during their conversations, which was a welcome sight.

"Maybe." He tried to avoid speaking by taking a sip of the too-hot liquid, scalding his tongue in the process. He wasn't confident in his ability to start up a meaningful conversation, but she kept inviting him regardless. 

"The main reason I invited you to join me was so I could give you this.” She reached under her cloak and pulled out an object wrapped in a small cloth. He took it from her hands and carefully unwrapped to reveal a brand new hunting knife. He immediately recognized it as high-quality. The blade was pristine with sharp ridges along the length and the leather handle was durable and polished to a shine. It was a well-crafted piece of handiwork that had to cost a decent amount.

"This is nice. Are you sure you want to give it to me?" He rolled it over in his hands and admired it one more time. 

"Yes. I never properly thanked you for taking me hunting last week. It helped me out more than you know..." Her eyes looked distant, but she continued to smile. Felix remembered how distraught she looked that day when he found her in the training grounds, sleep-deprived and determined to slice up training dummies until she was waist-deep in straw. He was no stranger to the grieving process, but also recognized how easily the desire for revenge could consume a person. 

"That was nothing. No need to thank me for it." He tried to play it off like a normal favor he would have done for any of his peers, but he knew that simply wasn't true.

"And I..." She paused for a moment. "I want you to think of me as your friend. Not just your professor. At least when we're spending time together like this." Her coy smile sent his heart into a frenzy. 

"I already do. You worry too much." Felix reassured her. The thought of calling her by something other than her title was still a foreign concept to him, but thinking of her as a friend was a possibility. It was the least he could do after receiving such a thoughtful gift from her.

"Good." She exhaled like she was holding a breath. Was she nervous? Despite her emotions leaking through more often, she remained difficult to read. 

"Thank you, Byleth." The name felt awkward leaving his tongue, but he simultaneously felt relieved when he said it, as if a barrier between them was broken down. It was the first time he'd called her by name. The way her eyes widened as the name left his lips made him worry he made a mistake.

"Of course." The flush of pink that surfaced on her face let him know it wasn't a mistake. 

* * *

iii.

"I need your help." Felix didn't bother with greeting Ingrid before jumping into his request.

"Straight to the point, I see. What do you need?" It was unusual for her friend to ask for help, so she assumed it must be important. 

"I need help buying a gift." 

"And you think I can help you with that?" She chuckled. Ingrid knew she was terrible at gift- giving, especially coming from a family without a lot of money to spare. 

"You’re a woman. You're supposed to know what other women like." Ingrid rolled her eyes at his comment, choosing to ignore it. Felix of all people should know that she was probably the least knowledgeable on the subject of girly things. But she couldn't resist the chance to tease him about it. 

"So this gift is for a girl? Wow, Felix, that's so unlike you. Have you been hanging around Sylvain too much?" 

"Any amount of time around Sylvain is too much." He mumbled. She laughed in agreement, knowing firsthand how bad of an influence their mutual friend was. 

"Honestly, I'm probably the worst person to ask for help. Maybe you should try Annette or Mercedes?" 

"No. They'll talk too much. I don't want to make a big deal out of this. Please." He sounded desperate enough that Ingrid started to feel bad for him. 

"Well, you seem really serious about this, so I can try my best to help. Is there any special occasion for the gift? A birthday or something?"

"No." He answered quickly. 

"Ok...do you know what kind of things she likes?" 

"No. If I knew that, I wouldn't be asking for your help." Felix had the nerve to get short with her despite being the one to ask for help. It worried her how used to his behavior she was. She had Glenn to thank for that. Despite having polar opposite ideals, they always shared the same foul mouth and bad temper.

"Ugh, I need something to work with here. Can you at least tell me who it's for? I might have an idea if it’s someone we both know" There was no way she'd get an answer out of him, but she tried.

"No." He didn't even hesitate with his response.

"You're impossible! How am I supposed to help pick out a gift without anything to go by?" She groaned. 

He let out an exaggerated sigh. "Well, you leave me with no choice. I guess I'll have to ask Sylvain for help." He lifted his hands up in defeat and started to walk away.

"No, Felix, wait!" She called out. He turned around. She knew whatever help she had to offer would be better than Sylvain's horrible gift ideas. "C'mon, I'll go shopping with you." 

They went to a town outside the monastery that had a small marketplace. Despite its size, it still overwhelmed them both when neither of them knew what to look for. 

"Could you just get her flowers?" Ingrid asked. They only browsed through a few stalls and she was already exhausted from shopping. Felix turned down every idea she gave him, enough times that she was starting to run out.

"Flowers die. I want it to last longer than that."

"Does this mystery girl wear any jewelry?" 

"Not that I know of." 

"That's an idea. I think there's a shop over there if you want to take a look." 

They browsed the jewelry display behind the counter, but nothing really stood out to either of them. It wasn't until they headed for the door that Felix stopped in his tracks. 

"That one." He pointed to a shelf inside a glass case by the door. Ingrid peered over his shoulder to get a closer look. 

"Felix you can't be serious. That thing is so gaudy.” He pointed to a necklace that Ingrid was sure no woman in their right mind would wear. Her words were meaningless as he ended up buying the ugly thing anyways. She questioned why he even brought her along at all if he wasn't going to listen. But Felix never listened to anyone once his mind was set on something. That kind of behavior was expected of him.

What Ingrid didn’t expect was seeing the professor wearing that same necklace during the lecture the next day.

* * *

iv.

When Byleth woke up in the morning, she noticed a piece of folded parchment on the floor by the door. When she unfolded it, there was a message that said "Meet at training grounds in the morning." No name was signed anywhere, but she recognized the handwriting from grading exams.

Following the note’s order, she promptly arrived at the training grounds. To no surprise, Felix was already there and it was early enough that they were the only two present. What surprised her was the lack of weapon in his hand. Instead of training, he was leaned against one of the walls with his arms crossed. His foot tapped anxiously against the stone pavement. It was clear he was nervous about something, but she hadn't the slightest idea what about. 

"I got your note.” Byleth walked over to where Felix was standing. “Did you want to spar or something?" 

“I always want to spar, but that's not why I asked you here.” He explained. 

"Is everything ok?” Before he answered, he reached into his uniform pocket and pulled something out that she couldn't see. 

"Here." It was a small velvet box. Her eyebrows scrunched together as she took it from his hand. "Because you gave me a gift the other day, I felt like I should give you something too." 

"You didn't need to do that, I was happy to give you something without expecting anything in return." She worried that she made him feel obligated to get her a gift, but she was still thankful for the gesture.

"I want you to think of me as a friend. Not just your student." Felix mimicked the words she said to him when he received her gift. Without further hesitation, Byleth opened the box. There was a tiny sword pendant attached to a silver chain inside. The sword itself was also made of silver with intricate designs carved in the hilt. The space where the blade and hilt came together was decorated with a brilliant cornflower blue sapphire. Other than her mother’s ring, she wasn't in possession of any jewelry. 

"Felix...this is beautiful. Thank you. I don't know what to say." 

“I didn't want to get you another sword since the one you use now is difficult to beat, so you'll have to settle for his instead.”

"It’s perfect. Will you help me put it on?" She handed him the necklace and pulled her hair away from the back of her neck. As he stood behind her and fastened the clasp, his fingertips brushed lightly against her skin. His cold hands made her shiver and she wanted nothing more than to hold those hands and warm them, but she knew now wasn't the time.

"There." He returned back to her frontside once the necklace was securely in place.

"What do you think?" She smiled as she looked down at the necklace sitting against her chest.

"It... suits you." He sounded like he was searching for the right thing to say. She suddenly felt bad for putting him on the spot, so she changed the subject.

"I still have some time before I have to meet with Lady Rhea. Care for a quick spar?" 

"I thought you'd never ask." He grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on [ Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/RatKingDimitri) for updates!
> 
> Side note: that necklace is 100% some mall ninja shit I'm siding with Ingrid on this one


	4. "Don't let me die then, idiot"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix gets injured and Byleth learns a new way to use her power.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta read by [ Sav572](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sav572) please check out the latest chapter in their [Felileth fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20941196/chapters/49786922)!

As the Imperial troops closed in on the monastery, Felix knew his chance to escape was dwindling. The Knights of Serios who remained only fought to clear a route for the survivors. The empire’s victory had been secured, won on the backs of numbers alone. Any attempt made to fight against the horde certainly would lead to nothing more than slaughter. 

Despite it all, Felix found himself pushing against the flow of the crowd, inwards towards the heart of the action. Amongst the chaos, a quick flash of mint-colored hair caught his eye. The professor was still heading deeper into battle.

Felix muttered to himself. “Why is that damned woman charging recklessly into a losing battle?” He knew that his former professor was a perfectly capable combatant. However, losing a good training partner would be...inconvenient. That was all.

Although he and his fellow Blue Lions had direct orders to not follow her, Felix disregarded them. He was never one to appease his superiors and with the monastery on the verge of collapse...it no longer mattered who was in charge anyway.

Felix dashed towards where he had seen the mint hair go. He was fortunate. Without heavy armor, he was quick on his feet. Besides, most of the knights weren’t paying attention to a single person who ran through the crowd. When Felix reached the end of the crowd, he attempted to avoid unnecessary fights. However, he was occasionally forced to cut down those that stood in his way. Luckily, the Empire’s overwhelming numbers seemed to come, not from elite knights but from everyday soldiers. He didn't have trouble winning the skirmishes, but each fight only widened the gap between him and the professor.

In the distance, Felix spotted an orange glow. Through the smoke, it was difficult to tell if it belonged to the Sword of the Creator. However, he had no other leads to go by. He watched as the glow retreated around the corner of one of the ruined chapels that littered the outskirts of the monastery. Turning the corner, Felix recoiled. The orange glow was not the relic but a fire spell in the palm of an Imperial mage. While he was able to avoid the brunt of the attack, his armor still took a minor scorching from the flames. Still, Felix had the advantage in close combat and was able to thrust his sword into the abdomen of the mage in front of him.

A sharp burning pain radiated from his shoulder and shot down his right arm. He had made an error in allowing himself to be distracted by the skirmish with the mage. His backside had been left unguarded. Felix’s fingers lost their grip on his sword. It clattered onto the ground. Instinctively, he pulled out the object that was lodged into his shoulder and cursed himself for not wearing thicker armor. A hand axe. From somewhere in the distance, an enemy had thrown a hand axe at him. Dropping the bloody weapon, Felix placed his fingers into the deep gash. _What was I thinking? At this rate I’ll bleed out no matter what direction I go._

Felix pressed forward, he at least had a chance of catching up with the professor, even if he was useless to her in battle. He tightened his grip on his sword, but it felt awkward in his left hand. If he had to, he could defend himself well enough, but his swings were clumsy and imprecise. He could still move his right arm slightly, but it felt like the wound was tearing open each time he did. No matter what, he had to keep moving. If he didn’t find her now, his injury would be for nothing. 

"Felix!" A voice called from above him. Ingrid swooped down quickly on her pegasus and hovered right above the ground next to him. “We have to leave now! Get on.” Felix spoke through clenched teeth. "Not until I find the professor." 

“Do you realize how foolish you sound? What are you going to do when you find her? You're injured!” Ingrid said firmly. 

He didn't want to admit it, but she was right. There was no way he would make it much further at the rate his wound was bleeding out. This was his only chance to escape, even if it meant leaving the professor behind. He didn't need to be convinced anymore. He let himself be pulled up on the back of the pegasus and wrapped his left arm around Ingrid as she took off into the sky.

"Where is Sylvain?" Felix felt guilty for not asking sooner. While he was busy throwing himself into danger looking for the professor, he didn't take notice of his friends’ locations on the battlefield. 

“He’s headed in the same direction as us. We’ll meet up with him as soon as it's safe to land.” Ingrid explained. Once they were far enough away from the monastery, things started to calm down. Felix was starting to get drowsy, so he tried his best to fight off the urge to close his eyes. In a last attempt to stay awake, he started talking. His words slurred as they left his mouth. "Where are we going?"

"Faerghus. It's our only hope for safety right now. Just hang in there a little longer, Felix, please." She begged him. He didn't understand the urgency in her voice. He was fine. Maybe a bit lightheaded and also in tremendous pain, but still fine. Without meaning to, he leaned his head on her shoulder. It wouldn't hurt to rest his eyes for just a moment, right?

"Please, stay awake!" She shouted."We're about to land.” 

He didn't remember the landing. They were in the air and then the next moment they weren't. The blood on his sleeves was dried up now and made his clothing feel stiff against his skin. He hauled one leg over the pegasus to let himself slide down, but his legs were so wobbly.

"Felix!" A voice screamed, but it sounded so far away. 

"Syl...vain..." He choked out. Before he could fall to his knees, Sylvain’s arms were behind his back, holding him barely upright. He felt himself being lowered to the ground gently. 

"Goddess, Ingrid, there's so much blood. I don't know if my healing magic will be enough. I don't think I can do it." Sylvain's voice was frantic. 

"You have to try, Sylvain!" She yelled. "He's going to die if you don't!" 

_Die? Who's going to die?_ Felix thought he was speaking out loud, but his lips wouldn't move.

"I know...I know." Sylvain let out a deep breath, bracing himself. "Okay, right, I'll do what I can. I'm sorry, Fee. This will probably leave a scar." Felix tried to reassure his friend, but nothing coherent came out of his mouth. 

Sylvain's healing magic felt different than Mercedes's did. He couldn't speak for Manuela's, because he avoided the infirmary at all costs, but Mercedes had healed a few cuts and scrapes for him before. Her healing felt like warm molasses trickling over his wounds. It wasn't painful by any means, but something about the sickly-sweet way it coursed through his veins was unpleasant to him. When Sylvain started healing him, it felt like gentle fingertips brushing against his skin. As the magic weaved his way further inside the wound, the fingertips sent tiny sparks of electricity through his bones and soothed all the aches and pains in his shoulder. Once the pain dulled, he started coming back to his senses. His eyelids fluttered open and his eyes met Sylvain's. He realized now that his head was in the other's lap as his shoulder was tended to. With nothing else to look at, he examined Sylvain's face closely. It was covered in dirt and blood from various nicks and cuts, but the main thing he noticed was a clean trail of skin from his eyes leading down to his chin. 

"You were crying." Felix managed to mumble the words. "Why?" 

"My best friend is currently bleeding out in my arms, so sorry if I get a little emotional.” Sylvain laughed, but it sounded more hysterical than amused. 

"Don't let me die then, idiot." Felix felt his eyelids getting heavy again. 

"I won't. I made a promise." Sylvain sniffled. A drop of wetness fell down onto his forehead from above. With what little strength he had left, he reached up with his uninjured arm and wiped away another tear before it could fall.

"Please, stay still, Felix. I'm almost done." 

The gash on his shoulder started to close itself shut like it was being threaded together with invisible stitches. The sensation was uncomfortable, but there was no pain. It became increasingly harder to stay awake, so he didn’t fight it anymore. As he drifted off, he dreamed of a hushed conversation between Sylvain and Ingrid. Ingrid was the first to speak. 

"When I was scouting the battlefield earlier, I saw the professor. She was attacked by someone and...she fell off a cliff. I don’t think anyone could survive a fall from that height, Sylvain” 

"Are you sure it was her?" 

"I'm sure."

“We’ve seen her survive crazier things, right? I mean, she cut a hole through the sky before.” Sylvain reminded her. 

“I suppose you're right. I hope she’s alive but…” Felix wasn't sure if Ingrid didn't finish her sentence or his mind tuned the conversation out again. His last thoughts before slipping into a deep slumber were of the professor and how he hoped everything he just heard was truly a dream.

* * *

As the ground collapsed beneath her feet, Byleth tried desperately to grab onto anything within reach. Only moments before, she was hit by a dark magic spell that dragged her back towards the edge of the cliff. Digging her heels into the dirt, Byleth thought she generated enough resistance to stop her momentum just shy of the cliff face. However, to her horror, the force of the spell had knocked the overhang loose from the rest of the cliff. There was no time to react. She began to plunge downwards just like the crumbled rocks and debris around her.

In a split second, Byleth attempted to activate her Divine Pulse. If successful, she could anticipate the arrival of the mysterious mage and keep herself far away from the cliff. However, in a panicked state, she could not concentrate enough. Countless times she’d used it to save her students’ lives, but never once to save herself. Reality sunk in. Her time had run out. Without any other options, Byleth closed her eyes and braced for death at the bottom.

The impact never came. Instead, when Byleth opened her eyes out of curiosity, only darkness surrounded her. As she continuously fell, Byleth blinked a few times but nothing changed. Was she...dead? That seemed like the only logical explanation. One second she was falling, the next everything was black.

Byleth had never given much thought to the afterlife. Even after being subjected to the church's teachings at the monastery. Perpetually falling into infinite nothingness seemed like a cruel punishment, but perhaps a fitting one for a former mercenary such as herself. She'd done her fair share of killing. Whether it be in the name of money or more recently, in the name of the church. Before she could further contemplate her morality, she heard a distant sound.

Coming from the abyss, a distant, strained voice spoke to Byleth. “So this is...my punishment…” _Dimitri_. Though she could not see the young prince, she recognized his voice. Through labored breaths, he continued to choke out words. “Professor..everyone...forgive me." 

Dimitri was nowhere in sight, yet Byleth inexplicably knew his voice was not an illusion. His presence felt nearby, as if only a thin veil separated them. No matter how hard she tried to make sense of what was happening, she was left with more questions than answers. It wasn't long before more dying voices joined in, creating a cacophony that Byleth struggled to understand. Though indistinct, she knew they were the last words of her students. 

"Where's my weapon? Damn it! Can't see...anything...” Recognizing Felix's voice chilled Byleth to the bone. Out of all of her former students, he was the one she least expected to die.

“Well?” Byleth was startled when she heard Sothis’s voice within her head. “You want to save the little ones, don't you? You must use your power.”

Following the order, Byleth closed her eyes and focused. A fiery heat burned in her chest, flowing outwards through the rest of her body like molten lava. Never before had she felt this powerful when using a Divine Pulse. In an instant, her falling ceased and the voices were silenced. 

“Both sides of time are revealed to you...and you alone.” Sothis repeated what she told Byleth before. “Do you understand what that means?” Byleth shook her head in response, earning a sigh from the young goddess. “Fine, listen carefully.” 

“Time as you know it only flows in one direction. This remains true even when you use the power I gave you. It may appear that you are reversing the flow of time, but that is simply not possible. You are leaping back to an earlier point in time.” 

Byleth scrunched her forehead in confusion. She never gave much thought to how her power worked before. It was just something she accepted without question. Sothis continued explaining.

“This place you are in now exists outside the flow of time. A place that only you and I are able to reach. From here, you can observe every timeline in existence. Can you sense them now?” 

Attempting to hone her senses, Byleth closed her eyes and concentrated. She sensed something that could only be explained as a tangled mess of strings that left her head aching. Sothis broke her concentration by speaking. “Don't strain yourself. I suppose it is overwhelming for a human to observe everything all at once. But nevertheless, you have now experienced the extent of your power.”

“So can I return back to the time before I fell off the cliff?” Byleth asked. 

“Of course you could go back to that point, but you will not save anyone that way. You could go all the way back to the day you were born and live out your entire life differently and it still wouldn't change a thing. You will always die at the exact same point in time. That is fate.” Sothis confirmed Byleth’s fear. Just as her father’s death couldn't be avoided, her own death was also fated from the beginning. She would never be able to go back in time and save her students or herself. 

“You cannot go back.” Sothis continued. “But you _can_ go forward.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've always liked the theory that Byleth traveled to the future as an explanation for her 5 year sleep. It was difficult to write out my exact thoughts, so if there are any questions let me know! Otherwise, it will be explained more in a later chapter. 
> 
> Follow me on [ Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/RatKingDimitri) for updates and discussion!


	5. "Don't speak of her to me ever again or I'll make you regret it."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix returns to Fraldarius territory and learns the severity of his injury.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, check out my beta reader [ Sav572](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sav572). You can find their latest [Felileth fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20941196/chapters/49786922) here!

The late morning sunlight burned red through Felix’s eyelids. Once the fog that clouded his brain started to clear, he became aware of a comfortable softness underneath him. A bed. After a few blinks, his surroundings became clear. He was in his childhood bedroom, still untouched from how it was before he left for the academy. 

An annoyingly familiar voice spoke up next to him. "You're finally awake."

He already dreaded facing the pathetic excuse for a father that was sitting in a chair next to his bed. There was hardly anything his old man could say that wouldn't annoy Felix. He let out an irritated sigh before responding. "Yes, your successor is alive." The usual bite in his voice was replaced by exhaustion. "You can leave now." 

"Felix. When your friends carried you to my doorstep unconscious and bloodied, I...I thought I had lost both of my sons. To say I'm relieved is an understatement.” For a second, Felix almost believed his father gave a damn about him. He knew better than to fall for that facade. 

"Of course you're relieved. If I died without throwing myself in front of the boar prince, I’d be a disgrace.” 

"The boar? You mean His Highness? I really wish you would stop referring to him as that." His father scolded him. Felix took the subject change as a sign that what he said was correct. It didn't matter if he died or not as long as it was an honorable death. His old man’s way of thought disgusted him. 

"And I wish the boar would stop referring to itself as human when he's clearly a beast in disguise." Felix hissed. 

"I don't know why I bother trying to speak with you. You're more stubborn than your brother ever was." His father snapped back. 

"I don't know why you try either." Felix turned away and faced the window instead. He hadn't been home for a full day and he was already being compared to his dead brother. The Fraldarius household was the same as ever.

His father let out a defeated sigh. "I'm going to send in the Gautier boy. He refuses to go back to his own territory until you wake up." Felix didn't bother to acknowledge him as he left the room.

When Sylvain finally arrived, he didn't immediately enter the room. Hovering in the threshold, he leaned up against the doorway and waited for permission to enter. By the way his friend hesitated, Felix could tell something was off. Sylvain was never one to respect boundaries, normally choosing to barge in whenever he pleased.

"Are you coming in or not?" Felix questioned. 

"Huh? Oh, yes. Sorry.” Sylvain tripped over his words, acting as if he was caught off guard by the sound of Felix’s voice. He crossed the room and took a seat at the foot of the bed. “How are you feeling?" 

"I'm fine. I don't feel any pain." It wasn't a lie. Felix didn't feel any pain in his arm. In fact, he didn't feel anything at all. 

"That's what I was worried about..." Sylvain grimaced. The redhead reached over and cupped Felix's limp right hand between both of his own. 

"I don't feel anything." Felix admitted. He realized the truth already. No matter how hard he tried, the arm wouldn't budge. 

Sylvain's voice cracked "I know, Fee.". His eyes wouldn't meet Felix’s, instead focusing on the ground beside the bed. “It’s my fault. I tried to heal your wound, but I don't think I put everything back together correctly.” Sylvain buried his face into his own hands, still holding Felix’s hand between them. "Your father sent a messenger out to one of the best healers in the area, but there's a chance that what I did is irreversible.” 

Whatever tears Sylvain was holding back finally escaped. It had been years since Felix saw his friend cry in front of him. The last time he could recall was not so different from the current situation. “ _ It’s all my fault!”  _ Sylvain cried. “ _ My brother was disowned because of me. I wish they just left me at the bottom of that well…”  _ Felix tensed up at the memory. Sylvain was always quick to blame himself for everything that happened to Miklan, and even now he tried to do the same with Felix's injury. 

"I'm so sorry, Felix. I don't expect you to forgive me, but—”

“What would I forgive you for?" Felix interrupted. He couldn't stand to listen to any more groveling. “Are you actually apologizing for saving my life? Don't be ridiculous.” 

Sylvain finally looked up at him. He was a mess of tears and snot, not unlike the whimpering, red-headed child from Felix’s memories. 

"It doesn't matter if I can't use my arm.” Felix continued. “I'll learn to swing a sword with the other one. Do you really think something as trivial as this would stop me from fighting? If you really think that, you're an even bigger fool than you look." 

Felix softened his voice. “Besides, I’m the one who should be apologizing to you. I carelessly put myself in danger and now you're carrying the guilt for my mistake." It was difficult to admit, but the fault was his own. His carelessness on the battlefield was what cost him his arm, nothing else. 

Sylvain wiped his face on his sleeve, attempting to regain some composure. Once he caught his breath, he spoke up. “You know that promise we made when we were kids? About sticking together until we die together?”

“I remember.” Felix recalled the exact day they made that promise. It was the day he found out that Glenn died. Before the death of his brother, Felix had never lost anyone close to him. At the time, making that promise with Sylvain was reassuring. Though unrealistic, it was comforting to believe there was one person who wouldn't die without him. 

"I swear I'm going to take things more seriously from now on. I'm going to study white magic so I can become a better healer.” Sylvain sounded determined now. ”And I'm going to train with you, every day if you'll let me. I want to be stronger, so I can keep our promise."

"It's about you got some sense knocked into you." Felix scoffed. 

* * *

Felix spent the rest of the day in bed, drifting in and out of consciousness. By the time nightfall arrived, he was anything but tired. Thankfully, his father didn't bother him again, taking the hint from their earlier conversation. Sylvain retired to a guest room down the hall, refusing to return back to Gautier territory until Felix was fully recovered. Finally alone, he was left with nothing but his thoughts. 

His chest ached when his mind inevitably wandered to Byleth. It was difficult getting used to thinking of her as Byleth and not the professor, but what did it matter now? She was dead. He'd never clash swords with her again. With his brother also dead, he'd now lost his two best training partners. 

If she saw him now, he could only imagine what she would think of him. Useless and unable to swing a sword. If she knew the reason was because he went on a reckless search for her in the middle of the battlefield... He'd never be able to face her again.

And he won't ever face her again. Because she's dead, he reminded himself. He decided from now on, he would rid his mind of any thoughts of Byleth. If he kept letting himself get hung up on the dead, he'd be no better than the boar or his father. Instead, he would focus all his energy on learning to fight again, and he would fight until the war was over. Then he'd find a way to keep fighting after that. He wasn't meant to love. He was meant to swing a sword and nothing else.

* * *

The next morning, Rodrigue insisted on training with his son. There was no use in trying to convince Felix to rest for another day, so he offered to spar with him instead. Not only could he keep an eye on him, it was likely the only way he could get Felix to tolerate being in the same room with him for more than a few minutes. 

“Not bad, old man.” Felix’s training sword clattered as it hit the ground. Even with his non-dominant hand, Felix was no easy opponent. Rodrigue considered himself a seasoned fighter, but his speed and dexterity weren't what they used to be. In his later years, he found himself more useful casting spells from afar rather than heading the front lines. 

"You nearly bested me, even with your left arm. You've been trained well." 

"No thanks to you." Felix muttered. Rodrigue was surprised his son made it this long without making some snide remark.

"Yes, well, I suppose I have that professor of yours to thank for that." 

Rodrigue recalled speaking with his son's professor when she came to help clear out thieves from Fraldarius territory nearly a year ago. 

"I understand Felix as well." Byleth's eyes looked softer than usual when she spoke of his son. But not quite in the way a teacher looks when speaking proudly of a student. The admiration appeared to run much deeper than that. 

"How fortunate Felix is to have met someone like you. There's nothing as heartening as having someone around who really understands you. He's an odd boy. Thick-headed in some ways. But he's my son all the same. I'm glad he has you to look after him.” He told the professor. 

"He puts on a tough exterior, but he's one of the most kind-hearted people I've ever met and he would do anything for those he cares about. You have much to be proud of, even if he doesn't walk the same path his brother did." Byleth pointed out.

"You're right...and I am very proud. Although he would never believe me if I told him. I'm afraid the rift between us has only grown wider over the years. So I'm counting on you to do so in my place. Please, give him the love and guidance he deserves, in whatever form that may take." 

Rodrigue remembered the way her cheeks flushed a light pink color at the implications of his words. Though she was a professor, Byleth appeared close in age with his son. It wasn't far-fetched to believe that there were feelings forming between the two. 

His memory was interrupt by the sound of his son aggressively putting away his training sword. Something he said must have struck a nerve with Felix, because he was scowling now, although it looked more pained than angry. Rodrigue was always saying the wrong things. It was just another one of the many reminders of what a failure of a father he was.

"Don't speak of her to me ever again or I'll make you regret it." Felix stormed off. 

“I already do regret it.” Rodrigue sighed to himself. He loved his son dearly, but liking him was a more difficult task. It was times like this where he wished his wife was still around to advise him. She was much better with their children than he ever was. 

But still, he was curious as to why speaking of the professor was such a sore subject. He hadn't heard much about her since the fall of Garreg Mach, so he assumed the worst. Felix had a certain way of dealing with death that involved resenting the dead for being dead. The best Rodrigue could do for his son was give him space, which only seemed to widen the rift between them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Real Sylvix hours start now. Move aside, Byleth. 
> 
> Follow me on [ Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/RatKingDimitri) if you'd like!
> 
> Update frequency will probably be 1-2 weeks now.


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